In the realm of brain retraining and neuroplasticity, Tessa Malcarne stands as a beacon of innovation and personalized coaching. A certified neuroplasticity consultant, Tessa embarked on her transformative journey within the structured confines of a leading brain-retraining program. For five years, she honed her skills, delving deep into the intricacies of nervous and limbic system imbalances while coaching hundreds of clients. However, the desire for a more tailored and individualized approach led Tessa to make a bold decision. Breaking free from the constraints of the established program, she chose to navigate the world of neuroplasticity on her own terms. Now, with four years of independent coaching under her belt, Tessa Malcarne is redefining the boundaries of brain coaching, passionately crafting a unique space where science meets individual choice. Join Mystic Mag as we explore Tessa’s journey
Can you share your personal journey of healing from mysterious health conditions and how it led you to become a Neuroplasticity Consultant?
Every person’s journey with mysterious health conditions begins with experiences that involve trauma and/or prolonged stressors, usually in the formative years. My story is no different. When I was a young child, I experienced a significant abandonment. I was around 2, so I have no recollection of this experience, but I know it to be true from others who were present at the time.
If, at a younger age, our core needs are not met, or our needs are ripped away from us, we will find a way to have those needs met. This may include people-pleasing, self-abandoning, morphing ourselves to seem perfect, getting into patterns of overachievement, we may become louder and more attention-seeking, we may shrink down and become silent as to not be seen, we may look for love in the wrong places, become anxious and withdrawn, etc.
The way our trauma acts itself out always depends on the specific circumstances we experienced. That is why every person’s mysterious health condition expresses itself in its own unique way; because we all come from different stressors and traumas.
After the abandonment I experienced, I then experienced a string of stressors that affected me on a foundational level. I withdrew, I never felt worthy, I thought everyone else was more important than I was, I believed everyone else’s needs were more significant than my own, and I began to live from a place of survival. I had no idea this was happening, as I was around the age of 8, but looking back, I can see just how disconnected I was from my own authenticity.
This pattern continued for years, until I was in my mid-20’s, and began experiencing symptoms of a dysregulated nervous system. At the time, however, I had no idea what that was. I thought I was (forgive my language) going to die.
I had extreme anxiety and panic, chemical sensitivities, chronic fatigue, and about 100 other symptoms that felt otherworldly. No doctors understood what I was going through, and although they were trying to help, it only took me further from understanding what I was going through.
What was I going through? A nervous system that had experienced trauma and stress for 20 years with no reprieve, and was acting out in a way any nervous system would under such circumstances.
I thankfully found a neuroplasticity program that educated me on what was actually happening within me, and that led me to see the patterns I had been engaging with that led me to such dysregulation. Those patterns were: people-pleasing, self-abandonment, self-gaslighting, giving away my power, living in fear, living out of trust,
These patterns pulled me away from who I really was, and disconnected me from my authenticity; which is, at the core, the reason any person’s nervous system is imbalanced. I now dedicate myself to helping others to see how their own disconnection from authenticity has created a dysregulated nervous system, and help them to find their way back to themselves.
How did your own experience with neuroplasticity play a role in shaping your mission to guide others through the process of healing themselves?
While on my own healing journey, I very quickly noticed that every professional had his/her own unique opinions. One doctor told me I would live this way for my entire life, whereas another told me to take large amounts of magnesium and take salt baths to “cure” myself. I was also told to change my entire diet, detox for weeks on end, and was told to get panels of testing done to more specifically identify the issues.
The more I researched, and the more I saw practitioners, the more I realized how much each individual opinion took me away from my own healing. Each opinion took me away from myself.
Healing does not come from a bottle, and it has little to do with what you eat (unless you eat unhealthily to the extreme, of course). Healing has everything to do with your connection to yourself. Healing is about getting out of fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and into a state of trust. Healing means learning what you need, what you like and do not like, and creating boundaries to protect your needs/wants/desires.
Because of my experience with other people’s opinions interfering with my healing and taking me off track, I knew that within my own practice with clients, I must not continue that pattern. I knew I must do everything I could to put the power back into my client’s hands, instead of stripping it from them. Because of my own experiences with neuroplasticity, that is my goal, always, in working with any client.
What type of services do you offer?
My offerings look different based on the individual client. I go into each session with an open mind, and without an agenda, so that I can listen to what the client is needing in that moment. When the nervous system is in a dysfunctional state, it goes through many different phases, which means my clients will need something different from me each time we meet. My job is to listen to what those needs are, and to meet them.
In a session, a client and I may talk about how to disassemble fear patterns for the entire call, whereas with another client, I may guide them through a trauma release if that I what I believe they need (and if they agree with me). So it is less about the services, and more about how I can identify the needs of the client, and meet them in the moment.
What specific techniques or practices related to neuroplasticity have you found most effective in your own healing journey, and how do you apply them in your consultations with clients?
The most effective techniques/practices I found in my own healing journey are: trauma processing, connection to authenticity, surrendering, and learning positive self-talk. I could list a few more, but these techniques/practices were at the core of how I regulated my nervous system, and they are at the core of my work with clients.
I apply these techniques/practices in my work with clients by always looking at my client’s struggles through the lens of one (or more) of the above foundational principles. In order to understand any of my client’s struggles, I ask a string of questions to figure out if their nervous systems are stuck in trauma, whether they may be out of connection to authenticity, if they are trying to control or surrendering, and/or if they are self-criticizing rather than speaking to the nervous system/themselves in a constructive/healing manner.
Since your focus is on healing from invisible health conditions, how do you approach clients who may be struggling with conditions that are difficult to diagnose or understand?
This happens a lot. When I have a client who struggles to believe his/her condition stems from a dysregulated nervous system, my job is to find every single detail the client could use as evidence to prove their condition is indeed coming from a dysregulated nervous system.
In this circumstance, I suggest the client creates a “script” for his/herself so that he/she is able to read that script in times he/she is struggling to believe the condition is coming from the nervous system. Every client’s list of evidence looks different, but in every single circumstance such as this, the client and I have been able to come up with a substantial list of evidence to help him/her redirect to the truth; the truth that the nervous system is causing his/her condition(s).
As a Neuroplasticity Consultant, what advice do you typically give to clients who are just starting their journey towards healing from invisible health conditions?
My goal with clients just starting out is to get them to see that they make their own decisions, that they always know what is best for themselves, and that nobody else knows (or will ever know) what is better for them. I want my clients to see that they have a superpower. Their superpower is that they know themselves better than anybody else could ever know them, which means they are allowed to trust their own decisions, and they are allowed to listen within. When a person trusts themselves, healing can occur so much more wholly.
I also want clients just starting out to see that there is always a way to take other people’s advice without giving any of their power away to the person providing the advice. Power comes from within, and guides our healing journey. When we perceive our power coming from other people’s advice and opinions, we limit ourselves.
