In a world where stress and anxiety have become commonplace, the pursuit of inner peace and holistic well-being has never been more crucial. Enter Margot Vance-Borland, a beacon of hope and transformation in the realm of mental health and spiritual healing. As a Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Body-Centered Hakomi Therapist, and Reiki Teacher, Margot seamlessly integrates traditional counseling techniques with innovative body-centered therapies and energy healing practices to guide her clients towards profound healing and self-discovery. Drawing from her extensive training and experience, Margot employs a holistic framework that honors the interconnectedness of all aspects of the self, fostering deep transformation from within. Join Mystic Mag as we delve into the world of Margot Vance-Borland, where therapy becomes a journey of self-exploration, empowerment, and ultimately, the restoration of inner harmony.
Can you describe how your background in body-centered Hakomi therapy and Reiki informs your approach to counseling and therapy?
I learned about it from Comey in 1988. So, it’s been about 36 years now. I studied with Pat Ogden, whose work is now called sensory motor psychotherapy. I worked with her for 2 1/2 years, then spent another two years with a different Hakomi trainer, Jon Eisman. I believe Pat Ogden, my primary teacher, is located in Boulder, Colorado. Over 36 years, things have changed a little, but the foundations remain. The way I learned involves mindfulness. However, in recent years, I’ve noticed that mindfulness means different things to different people and in different situations. In this case, mindfulness was not so much a meditative process but more about helping clients ‘go inside,’ close their eyes, and just be present with whatever is coming up for them – whether it’s body sensations, tightness, tears, memories, or anything else. One of the many things I love about Hakomi and sensory motor therapy is that there’s no right or wrong answer. We make space for whatever comes up, pay attention to it, honor it, and find out what it needs.
I always compare it to how you would talk to a little kid if you were a nice person. You wouldn’t say, ‘snap out of it’ or ‘stop being angry.’ You’d ask, ‘What’s going on, honey? Tell me what’s going on.’ It’s about listening to that inner child with compassion and caring, without any agenda as to how it should be. There has to be room to feel the anger, grief, or sadness, and it’s by making space for that and welcoming it in a way, being patient with it, that it has the opportunity to shift. We find out what it needs to feel safer, what the young child who may have experienced something traumatic needs now. Is it okay if we hold her, hug her? Can she put her own hand on the place that hurts and notice what happens? There’s a lot of slowing down in the sessions, a lot of noticing, and making room for whatever wants to come up.
Over the years – about 35 years before I took a break due to COVID – I found the work deeply satisfying. It was great for the clients, but also for myself as a therapist. You feel the healing process happening within yourself. When we hold space for others, it allows us to hold space for our own wounded inner child as well. That was the main way I did therapy.
Then, about 16 years after studying with Pat Ogden and other trainers, I went back to school to get a regular counseling license in the state of Oregon and the US. Even then, about 20 years ago in 2004, the counseling world wasn’t as aware of the body-mind connection. EMDR was gaining respect and usage, and I took a class in it because that’s what everyone was talking about. Nobody was talking about Hakomi at the time. However, over the last 20 years, the counseling world has become more aware of the body-mind connection. There are at least five different methods that have gained recognition: EMDR, Hakomi, sensory motor therapy (Peter Levine’s work), somatic experiencing, and the newer method called Internal Family Systems. I haven’t delved deeply into Internal Family Systems, but from what I’ve learned in some online classes, it seems deep and offers a way of working with how trauma manifests in the body, making gentle space for it to be acknowledged and attended to, and finding out what’s needed for healing. It’s not about covering it up with platitudes or focusing only on positivity; it’s about making space for deep-level change to happen.
How do you integrate principles of mindfulness and somatic awareness into your counseling practice?
Well, it’s a little hard to describe, but for some people, mindfulness means more like meditation. You know, like it’s a form of meditation, and I’m not even really quite sure if there are lots of variations on that. In this case, well, you know, like when we, okay, to backtrack a minute. When we meditate, we kind of have a goal to get to a certain destination, to quiet our busy mind, to get into that alpha or is it beta or Theta space of the brain. And with mindfulness in counseling, or when it’s kind of body-centered, it’s not so much to get to a certain place, it’s just to be present with whatever is coming up, to slow down enough, like just to slow down enough to notice where you’re tense in your body. Like if we’re rushing around, you know, doing errands or trying to get someplace on time, we’re not paying attention to where our bodies are, we’re just going. We’re go, go, go. In this case, we’re like, ‘Ah, oh. I feel the tightness. Oh, I can feel where my stomach’s clenching,’ or ‘I can feel, you know, that I go into some fight or flight kind of response, even if it’s just tiny.’ If we slow down enough in a mindful way, it’s how we notice those little subtle shifts. And that’s the pathway forward to finding out, well, what would help this place? What could make things feel more peaceful inside? Not like it should be this or it should be that. But just like, what would work for me? What does feel better? And even just saying that, my voice gets quieter, you know, and slower. Slowing down is a big part of it and yeah, being respectful, even if it’s like I said earlier, angry feelings or, you know, uncontrollable grief or just the big emotions.
What type of services do you offer?
These days, I see a few people for a massage, and then I have a lot of people reaching out to me for Reiki. I learned Reiki from Mrs. Takata when I was 21 years old in 1973, and I was living in California. One of my high school friends, who then became my college mate during our first or second year in college in 1970-1971, had just learned Reiki from Mrs. Takata. At that time, Reiki was not a well-known practice at all. She performed some Reiki on us at our little apartment, and I asked her to let me know if she came again because I wanted to learn it. A couple of years later, I found out that Mrs. Takata was coming to San Jose, where I grew up, and I went there to learn from her.
Afterward, I was traveling a lot and doing various things for the next ten years. But ten years later, I became a massage therapist. That’s when I started to incorporate Reiki a little bit with massage—not full Reiki treatments so much, but if someone had an injury, an ache, or some kind of pain, I would pause the massage and apply Reiki by laying my hands on them to let the energy flow through. Later, after learning Hakomi from 1988 to 1991, someone in my class noticed that I did Reiki and asked if I wanted to learn more. By then, Mrs. Takata had passed away, so I learned Reiki 2 in 1991 and then became a teacher in 1994.
These days, especially when the pandemic hit and even before that because the US has been in deep trouble, I felt that if I were going to do anything to make things better, doing Reiki and teaching as many people as possible is the one thing I can do that might shift things a little. Each of us has our own sphere of influence, and with teaching, it spreads even further because then those people work on others, and it brings a sense of calm. I feel it’s a connection to the spirit when we’re doing it and when we’re receiving it. It’s always great to hear the stories people tell about their experiences, what they see, feel, and sense.
In what ways do you collaborate with clients to incorporate holistic healing techniques into their treatment plans?
As I mentioned, I’m not currently practicing counseling, but when I was, there was a choice for clients. It was completely up to the client whether they preferred to sit on the couch across from me for the entire session or if they signed a consent form for touch, allowing for Reiki as well. It’s hard to describe exactly, but if they were sitting on the couch, I could send Reiki energy across the room a little, but when practicing the Hakomi method or sensory motor therapy, the way I learned it way back when, we had them close their eyes.
So when they came in for the session, they would tell me what was going on in the regular conversational way. Then, we would switch gears, and they would close their eyes, usually followed by a deep breath. They’d report what they were noticing, slowing down and paying attention to sensations such as tightness in their belly or heart. Then, we would use gentle prompts, like asking them to notice what happens when they place their hand on a specific area. If it was me working on them, I’d ask them to notice what happens when I place my hand there. Of course, I was careful not to do anything that might feel inappropriate, erring on the side of caution.
Usually, they would report feeling their heart relaxing a little, but sometimes, it might even tighten up. Instead of seeing that as a negative, it was just more reason to be curious. Then, another common prompt would be asking if there were words they wanted to say to that place or, in some cases, if they were visualizing themselves as a child in a particular scenario.
As they shared, we just journeyed together, and I have to say, almost 100% of the time, people felt lighter. Something shifted in a sensory, motor kind of way. It’s not like it’s gone forever; it could be a lifelong process of reassuring that scared part of oneself.
I had a very positive experience doing this kind of work, and I must say it’s just as gratifying to do this work as it is to receive it. I was blessed in many ways; my husband had a stable job with health insurance. In the US, health insurance is a big issue, but I could see a few clients thanks to Pat Ogden’s suggestion of longer sessions. So, I set up my practice in Corvallis, and we moved there 33 years ago. I practiced two-hour sessions, seeing only three clients a day with breaks in between to regroup and center again.
How do you address the mind-body connection in your counseling sessions, and what strategies do you use to help clients cultivate greater awareness of this connection?
It’s somewhat what I’ve mentioned. After we talk for a bit, I have them close their eyes and report what they’re noticing. Often, tension in a certain part of the body is part of that, and then we just, like I always call it, ‘pull up a chair’ and make room for it. We stay with it for a little while, you know? So, what might that part need, I wonder? At some point, I learned to reframe things instead of asking questions, more like stating. I don’t remember who taught me that or suggested it, but rather than having them try to come up with an idea on their own, with their busy brain, I just wonder what that place might need. Let’s try a few things. So, see what happens if you put your hand there or…
Maybe they start hearing words, like ‘it’s OK to be scared.’ So, let’s hear, let’s see what happens when I say those words back to you. Just notice what happens for you when you hear the words, ‘it’s OK for you to be scared.’ It’s OK. It makes sense that you’d be scared. You know, it’s like that gentle slowdown. Just as I’ve already said, it’s like they hear it, there’s a big sigh, and often they’re letting go and then it feels lighter.
What else might that part want to hear, I wonder? Then, you kind of follow through on what comes up for them, following through on whatever words they might want to hear or need to hear, whatever touch or physical comfort they might need. So, it’s audio, it’s visual. So, maybe…
What if you brought somebody? This is another common one. Is there a grandma that you really felt safe with? Or sometimes it’s an angelic figure. You know, what would happen if Grandma was there with you right now? Is that with that little girl or what would happen if the older you were there right now with that little girl? Like, what does she need, I wonder? Then, whoever it is comes into the picture in their mind, maybe holding them, or they sit on… the little girl sits on this person’s lap. Or the angel comes and wraps a wing around them. Or, you know, it’s just so beautiful, these different things.
So, notice what she’s feeling. Uh-huh. Is there anything she’d like to say? And then the words come, if they’re going to. Or anything she’d like to do. Oh, and another thing that can often happen is I remember once in a Hakomi training…
I had a Siamese cat when I was… I don’t know, we probably had that kitty for 8-10 years or something. Moki. And he was my love. I saw him and I was holding him close to my heart in the session.
Maybe there’s an animal that was a big part of your life that you want to bring into this image now and you just kind of go with the flow. I also encourage people at the end of a session to write some stuff down because a lot of times it’s kind of like dreams. I think of it being similar to dreams. You’re in a slightly altered state when you’re doing this kind of work, and images might come from memories, words, specific words, whatever. It’s helpful to write it down as soon as it’s over, usually because sometimes those things go away. I’ll write stuff down as they’re telling it to me, and then I hand them a sheet of paper that has some of the significant words or maybe an image that they saw. Sometimes they go home when… or, I used to do this when I was able to get sessions in person. I would journal afterwards and always have colors available so that if they’re seeing colors or something, they can add that to what they’re creating.
I do that with my Reiki classes too. I have that stuff available because so many young people these days see colors and have these kinds of out-of-body experiences.
It’s amazing. Because they haven’t had to shut it down in the same way. I think our culture has become a little more open and accepting of these things, and so it’s lovely. It feels like messages from spirit, you know, coming through for the client and for me as a therapist doing the work and stuff.
For a Reiki practitioner or Reiki teacher, I mean, every time I teach, I’m just blown away by what people experience. It’s a pretty positive thing for sure.
